5:1 Growing the Owl Brain from the Inside Out

Big Picture

Why start here: It makes sense to want to calm the watchdog and possum first, but growing the owl brain gets more bang for our buck.

Module focus: Offering felt safety.

Key reminders:

  • Felt safety can only be offered, never yanked into

  • We're not in charge of whether kids receive it

  • We can be creating felt safety while a child still isn't experiencing it

Three sources of safety cues:

  1. The environment

  2. The caregiver

  3. The child's internal world ← this lesson

1. Food 🍎

Why it matters: Chronically stressed brains burn more calories. Kids may need to eat more often or crave quick energy (sugar, carbs).

The approach:

  • Offer food every two-ish hours

  • High fat if possible for sustained energy, but the bottom line is feed them

  • Felt safety is very hard to build if there's contention around food, or if a child isn't eating enough (or perceives they aren't)

When food is complicated

  • Food trauma, and attachment or relationship trauma, can both create food triggers

  • Food and nurturing attachment can't be untangled

  • Be upfront: this lesson won't address serious food challenges

  • Refer to Dr. Katja Rowell: Love Me, Feed Me (adoptive families) and When Mealtimes Are Hard

Options for food preoccupation

  • Easy, sometimes unlimited food

  • Snack drawer (fridge), snack shelf (pantry), snack box (bedroom)

  • Fanny pack with snacks, snacks in the car

  • Pick kids up with a snack

  • Make food visible: countertops, table, tops of cabinets

  • Shelf-stable chocolate milk: fat, carbs, protein, feels like a treat, and straw drinking is good sensory input

Scaffolding food access

  1. Constant access, no asking

  2. Asking, and the answer is always yes

  3. Asking, always yes to select "healthy" foods

  4. An "always yes" shelf or drawer

2. Hydration 💧

Why it matters: Easy to overlook, theoretically easy to fix, and a real help for internal felt safety.

Scaffolding:

  • Start with the healthiest thing the child will drink

  • As felt safety grows, slowly shift from sugary drinks toward water

3. Movement 🏃

Why it matters: Bodies are made to move. Movement keeps us connected to ourselves and in energetic balance.

Guidelines:

  • Movement breaks every 15 minutes

  • Gross motor movement (even walking) every 2 hours

  • Never lose recess for behaviour

Concrete tips for parents:

  • Begin and end the school day at a playground or park

  • Park a few blocks away and walk (skip the pick-up line!)

Facilitator note: Stressed parents need concrete tips, even obvious ones. Your bank of suggestions will grow the longer you do this work.

The hill to die on ⛰ī¸

Kids with behavioural challenges need more movement and free play, not less. They likely also need co-regulation support on the playground (next module).

Easy indoor movement

  • Pillow fights, forts, jumping on the bed

  • Obstacle courses, sensory play

  • Wii, dance party

  • Slapjack, hide and seek

4. Beyond Our Scope 🔍

Remember: The body scans many internal cues. These are only a few. When a child is in protection brain, consider all of them.

Interoception struggles: Good candidates for trauma-informed, relational OT. Consider referring for assessment.

When connected, regulated parenting isn't enough: Something in the child's inner world may be outside our scope. Possible referrals:

  • Psychiatry

  • OT

  • Medical (neuro-immune disorders)

  • Nutrition

  • Adjunct therapies: Safe & Sound, Neurofeedback